Moving On
by Resoan
Summary: After her encounter with Alenko on Horizon, Shepard considers the tatters of their relationship, or lack thereof. Set directly after the mission on Horizon. Assumes a female Shepard who romanced Kaidan in ME1.


After successfully beating Mass Effect and its direct sequel, I felt the need to write _something_ for the fandom! This is set directly after the mission on Horizon, and assumes the F!Shepard romanced Kaidan in the first game. I'm not sure how the fans feel about the dialogue, but I was very irritated and upset with the encounter!

No. I'm not Bioware, nor do I claim to be.

Messages/reviews are extremely appreciated and welcome! Do enjoy the angst.

* * *

Two years. Had it really been so long ago? Then again, time passed differently when one was dead; how was Shepard supposed to know the galactic universe had gone to hell since she had supposedly saved it from Saren and Sovereign? _It was going to hell long before I ever showed up_, Shepard instead mused with a bitter smirk, the Commander of the Normandy currently hovering over her personal console in the Captain's Quarters. Upon returning to the Normandy from her mission on Horizon, Commander Shepard found herself on the receiving end of one long debrief from the Illusive Man, followed by a separate interrogation from Yeoman Chambers. While the naturally personable woman was otherwise a welcome sight to Shepard, the Commander found the irritatingly perky attitude more than she could bear after such a brief and unpleasant run-in with one Kaidan Alenko. Chambers meant well, surely, but Shepard had nearly lost her cool composure with the woman's incessant questions and need to pry.

Garrus had been at Shepard's side during the fiasco, the turian sticking up for his Commander though doing little to sway Alenko's insistence that what they were both doing was inherently evil. Shepard would be the first to admit that Cerberus was not saintly in any regard, except perhaps their supposed xenophobia, but losing thousands of humans merely due to their proximity to the Terminus Systems made Kaidan and his precious Alliance just as guilty. She wasn't quite sure which hurt worse: the fact that Kaidan actually believed she had knowingly not informed him of her return to the land of the living and was currently working whole-heartedly with Cerberus, or that she was not at all surprised. Kaidan had been open-minded when they had traveled to stop Saren; had so much changed in the short time she had been gone? Their_ love_ was almost laughable now, and the icing on the cake had to be the ridiculous letter Kaidan clearly thought would excuse every stupid remark he had said on Horizon.

His words and unwillingness to believe Shepard was just the final twisting of the figurative knife. So be it. Were he to insist that the Alliance and the Council were in the right, who was Shepard to disillusion him? But _damn_ if it didn't leave a definitive aching in her chest. Kaidan was supposed to be _her _ally, the one on whom she could rely and look to for strength. Instead, the man had coldly shown her his disdain and lack of remorse for his cutting words.

Slamming a fist onto her desk, Shepard grimaced at the pain, her eyes shifting to anything but the picture frame that seemed to peer into her soul, constantly questioning her judgment. Taking a much needed breath, Shepard turned coolly to the picture, her eyes hollow and her lips pursed as she deftly turned the frame onto its glass. No longer would she be judged by such a biased and betraying man.

Clenching her jaw, Shepard fought away the tears that pricked at the corners of her eyes, the Commander finally standing and turning towards the corridor to the elevator. Kaidan Alenko would _not_ be the reason she failed to save the galaxy, and neither would he be the reason she could no longer live her life, and happily at that.

The Illusive Man had forwarded the next few dossiers, and hopefully finding the candidates and recruiting them would be a suitable distraction.

"Commander," Yeoman Chambers immediately saluted once Shepard exited the elevator onto the second deck, Shepard inclining her head as a tacit reply before moving to the Galaxy Map.

Well, as the saying went, there are always more fish in the sea; though, with the great number of galaxies and star systems, finding the correct _fish_ might prove a difficult task. "Joker, plot us a course to Ilium. We have an assassin to find," Shepard instructed, the pilot's affirmative answer reaching the Commander's ears before she turned and headed for the Armory to properly gear up for the mission which would no doubt be an involved process.


End file.
